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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 15:39:30 GMT -5
Are you not sports entertained?
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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 15:39:34 GMT -5
Roster Adam Drug Doer All American Weed Guy News Anchor Gigantic Titties Man That is Large Old Noodle Hair Motivational Speaker Sister Abigail's Brother Bork Sable Guy Dressed as a Rabbit Antonio These 4 Ropes The Man of 1004 Returns Retired Guy Guy That Isn't Perfect Former Jobber Now Mimics a Guy Daniel Bella Jennifer Hudson's Husband Crazy Guy That Wears Tanktops Mexican Guy #1 Midget Dressed as Bull Sister Abigail's Brother's Son #2 Noodle Hair Johnny Danceman Mexican Guy #2 Weird Transvestite Guy Guy That Was in a Band Horngobbler Samoan Brother #1 Samoan Brother #2 John Bella Libertarian Glenn Royal Rumble Spot Guy Demolition Wannabe #1 Sister Abigail's Brother's Son #1 Black Olympian Former Reality Show Contestant Gang Member Bob Orton's Son Masked Mexican Guy That is Always Injured Road Agent Actor The Rock's Cousin Bulgarian Guy That Plays a Russian Guy Hungry Man SETH Ginger Masked Mexican Guy That Always Botches The Artist Formerly Known as the Dashing Guy Borden Stevens Black Guy That is Ripped Triple H McMahon Nattie's Husband Old Guy That is Dead But Not Actually Demolition Wannabe #2 The Black Guy That Did Better In TNA Jobber
April Brooks Foxy Small Boobs Bella Melina vs. Alicia Fox Who? Total Diva Always Inactive Samoan Brother #2's Wife Likes Cats Big Boobs Bella British Girl Mexican Woman Can't Wrestle For Shit Jimmy Snuka's Daughter
Tag Teams Demolition Wannabes The Samoan Brothers Former Reality Show Contestant & Former Jobber Now Mimics A Guy New Nation - Gigantic Titties, Royal Rumble Spot Guy & The Black Guy That Did Better In TNA The Old Guys That Should Have Retired - Old Guy That Likes Asses & Old Guy That Yells About Not Knowing Weird Transvestite Guy & The Artist Formerly Known As Dashing
On Air Talent Security Guard #1 Security Guard #2 Legs Bork Sable's Microphone Guy Stephanie Triple Hson Guy That Used to Wrestle from England Guy With Mustache That Hates Mexicans
Commentators Former Ally of Former Reality Show Contestant 5 Time Black Guy That Was on NXT Jerry Pervert James Boner Licker Vintage!
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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 15:40:06 GMT -5
Main Event Belt Daniel Bella
Mid-Card Belt That Means Nothing #1 News Anchor
Mid-Card Belt That Means Nothing #2 Bulgarian Guy That Plays a Russian Guy
Two Guys Belt Adam Drug Doer & Ginger
Bathroom Break Belt Big Boobs Bella
Briefcase Gimmick
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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 15:40:24 GMT -5
IDK
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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 15:40:52 GMT -5
Okay post maybe
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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 16:46:12 GMT -5
World Sports Entertainment presents 30 Sweaty Men Throwing Each Other Around For An Hour The show begins with your typical spiel of stupid nonsense that nobody cares about from Jerry Pervert, James Boner Licker and Vintage! 5 Time is noticeably absent but they don't say anything because Jerry is secretly a racist. Vintage! says that the first match tonight will allow you to take a bathroom break early as it is British Girl and Likes Cats taking on The Boob Twins.
The Boob Twins use their gigantic honkers to beat British Girl and Likes Cats over the head and easily win by pinfall. The commentators don't even recap the match as we move on.
Backstage, Generic Interviewer asks John Bella about his match and he says that Bork Sable and SETH aren't kid friendly so Triple H McMahon will not allow them to win so he feels as confident as ever. 5 Time arrives at the announce table with a bucket of KFC chicken and he says that they are the sponsors tonight before winking at the camera.
The next match will see The Samoan Brothers defending the Two Guys Belt against Former Reality Show Contestant & Former Jobber Now Mimics A Guy. The match ends with Former Reality Show Contestant using a DVD of The Real World to distract Samoan Brother #2 which gets him counted out meaning that The Samoan Brothers will retain their belt.
The Old Guys That Should Have Retired cut a weird promo about the Demolition Wannabes in which they say that they are going to have their way with them. Sex is implied.
Adam Drug Doer is in the ring with his groupies as well as Antonio These 4 Ropes and Nattie's Husband. Drug Doer says that he is giving away free marijuana here tonight and joints rain from the ceiling. Drug Doer lights one and begins smoking as we cut backstage to Old Guy McMahon clutching his chest and falling to the floor before being carted off by the EMTs.
In a match that was heavily censored, The Old Guys That Should Retired and the Demolition Wannabes had well, had a match. The climax (*wink wink*) came (*wink wink*) when Old Guy That Yells About Not Knowing yelled at Demolition Wannabe #1 and knocked him out.
Backstage we see Bork Sable's Microphone Guy massaging Bork Sable's chest with oil and he says that after tonight they are going to celebrate like there's no tomorrow. Bork winks at the camera and the camera zooms in on his crotch area where there is some movement. It's not what you think though as a squirrel crawls out and runs away.
In the match before the big match, Bork Sable managed to fend of John Bella and SETH to win with help from his Microphone Guy who threw a microphone at John Bella's head. Following the match, SETH cashed in his gimmick to win the Main Event Belt but Triple H McMahon came out and said that SETH wasn't kid friendly and booked John Bella vs. SETH right now and John Bella grabbed a kid from ringside and hit SETH over the head with him before pinning him to win the Main Event Belt.
Up next is the 30 Sweaty Men match which features 30 of the sweatiest men that have been in World Sports Entertainment. The sweaty men were very sweaty but the sweatiest was Noodle Hair who knocked about of other sweaty guys out the ring when they slipped on his sweat. Eventually the 30 Sweaty Men match comes down to The Rock's Cousin and Johnny Danceman. Danceman someone manages to dance Rock's Cousin over the top rope to win the right to face John Bella at Sports Entertainment's Not Super Bowl. The show ends with James Boner Licker saying to tune in for Monday Night 4 Pounds of Shit in a 3 Pound Bag.
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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 17:29:44 GMT -5
WSE Monday Night 4 Pounds of Shit in a 3 Pound Bag The show begin with a very sensual video package of 30 Sweaty Men. At the announcer's booth, James Boner Licker, Vintage! and 5 Time welcome us to the show. 5 Time has KFC once again and says that they're still the sponsor. Triple H McMahon and Stephanie Triple Hson come out and cut a 2 hour promo regarding John Bella and SETH before Jennifer Hudson's Husband comes out and says that he's a lawyer and that he's suing them because they are ruining his life. Crazy Guy in a Tank Top comes out and jumps around the ring like he's having a seizure so Triple H McMahon books them against one another.
Before we get our first match we cut to a hospital room where Old Guy McMahon is laying in a bed. Adam Drug Doer, Antonio These 4 Ropes and Nattie's Husband arrives. Old Guy tells them to get the hell out and Drug Doer lights up a joint and Old Guy clutches his chest and falls off the bed as doctors rush in.
In our first match of the evening, Melina vs. Alicia Fox takes on Samoan Brother #2's Wife and everyone takes a bathroom break and the commentators leave ringside to get some refreshments. The referee even leaves as well and Melina vs. Alicia Fox is forced to count the pin herself to win.
Former Reality Show Contestant is backstage when Former Jobber Now Mimics A Guy approaches him. Former Reality Show Contestant throws a DVD copy of The Real World at him and knocks him out making the fans boo like crazy.
SETH is looking pissed when The Rock's Cousin arrives and says something about succotashes which makes SETH angry. SETH says that he doesn't put a blonde streak in his hair because he's gay. Weird Transvestite Guy grabs his ass and asks who said gay. SETH says that they can go back to his locker room and they skip down the hallway together.
Johnny Danceman is interviewed by Generic Interviewer and says that he can to get oiled up and get it on with John Bella at Sports Entertainment's Not Super Bowl. Cut to Old Guy McMahon screaming that's not PG before falling on the floor again.
We finally get to another match which see's Jennifer Hudson's Husband bring an entire legal defense team to the ring as well as a judge and he says that they are going to fight it out like real men. Crazy Guy That Wears Tanktops goes crazy and beats Jennifer Hudson's Husband until he is bleeding and we cut to Old Guy McMahon flat lining in the hospital. The segment ends with the judge screaming "GUILTY!" at no one in particular.
Libertarian Glenn comes out and cuts a strange promo on why he shouldn't have to pay taxes. Stephanie Triple Hson comes out and says that he has to fight Hungry Man right now.
Hungry Man quickly defeats Libertarian Glenn by eating him. The commentators are very disgusted and 5 Time throws up his KFC chicken.
In the big match of the evening, Bork Sable surprisingly comes out but it is soon evident that it's not the real Bork because let's be real, he appears once every 6 months. It is Former Jobber Now Mimics A Guy dressed as Bork who will be facing off against Daniel Bella. Daniel Bella makes Fake Bork tap out to the Crippler Crossface which leads the commentators to talk about Chris Benoit and the show goes off the air with Old Guy McMahon lay on the floor of the hospital foaming at the mouth.
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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 18:01:11 GMT -5
WSE Rock's Catchphrase Black Guy That Was on NXT, Vintage! and Jerry Pervert welcome us to the show and somehow Old Guy McMahon is here! He says that they are all in trouble for not being PG. Old Woman McMahon makes her return by saying that her congressional run was shit and she happily screwed Old Guy out of all his money. Old Guy's quads explode with rage as he falls to the mat. EMTs immediately rush out and cart him off.
Small Boob Bella is in action against Always Inactive who has returned but will inevitably leave again after this match. The commentators, referees and fans vacate the arena during the course of the match which Small Boob Bella wins because Always Inactive is leaving after the match.
Noodle Hair cuts a promo wondering why the hell his hair looks like Ramen noodles. Sister Abigail's Brother arrives and says it's because he hasn't followed the Buzzards and Adam Drug Doer arrives and shares a joint with them and we cut to Old Guy McMahon getting run over by a car in the parking lot.
Bulgarian Guy That Plays a Russian Guy and Legs come out and Legs says that they want a challenge. Ginger comes out and lights them on fire before adding "Who's a fire crotch now?" before giggling and running off.
Antonio These 4 Ropes and Nattie's Husband come out to face off against Weird Transvestite Guy & The Artist Formerly Known As Dashing. Nattie's Husband throws a cat at The Artist Formerly Known As Dashing and they win via pussy power. Likes Cats bounces up and down on the outside as her pussy powered them to the win.
News Anchor comes out and says that he has some news and proceeds to open up BBC World News on his tablet and reads off several articles before the fans begin chanting "Fuck you!" and News Anchor challenge anyone to a match and Man That is Large comes out and knocks him out to win.
Johnny Danceman comes out and calls John Bella out and John Bella says that Johnny Danceman is kind of kid friendly so Triple H McMahon might let him win but he's John Bella so it's inevitable that he will win. The show ends with John Bella hitting Danceman with the Attitude Adjustment and jumping into the crowd and crushing numerous children.
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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 18:22:08 GMT -5
WSE Monday Night 4 Pounds of Shit in a 3 Pound Bag The commentators are nowhere to be found as we open the show. The fans are confused before the titantron fires up as we see 5 Time, Vintage! and James Boner Licker in the drive-thru of KFC. 5 Time says you can get all this fine KFC chicken for just $9.99 before winking at the camera.
Triple H McMahon comes to the ring and says that Daniel Bella will be facing John Bella tonight in the Battle of the Bellas! Borden Stevens interrupts and says that at Sports Entertainment's Not Super Bowl he is going to fight Triple H McMahon and become the Kayfabe Match Booker. Triple H McMahon says that he will fire him. Borden Stevens says he is going to Sting Triple H McMahon and pulls down his pants and *CENSORED*.
The Demolition Wannabes open the action by facing off against Gigantic Titties and Royal Rumble Spot Guy. Gigantic Titties crushes Demolition Wannabe #1's head between his tits and the referees ends the match.
Ginger is backstage with Generic Interviewer and says that he lit Bulgarian Guy That Plays a Russian Guy on fire because he was told to by a higher power. Adam Drug Doer walks into the shot and says that it was him. He was the "higher" power and winks at the camera as the two run away giggling like school girls.
Nattie's Husband is backstage with Likes Cats and says that he can't wait to rub her pussy. Likes Cats winks at him and we cut to Old Guy McMahon screaming about that not being PG before being attacked by mutant turkeys which are shooed off by Security Guards #1 and #2 but it's too late, Old Guy is dead.
Jobber shows up and talks about iced tea for some reason and The Rock's Cousin shows up and screams "SUPERMAN!" before punching Jobber in the face knocking his head off his shoulders. Noodle Hair watches from afar eating Ramen still wondering why his hair looks like noodles.
There is a bed set up in the middle of the ring. SETH comes out and says that it's time for a live sex celebration! Weird Transvestite comes out and SETH says that just because he's about to have sex with a man does not make him gay. The two engage in some bum lovin' and the show ends with Old Guy McMahon's head exploding with rage.
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Post by Joey on Jan 25, 2015 18:49:26 GMT -5
WSE Rock's Catchphrase Triple H McMahon opens the show apologizing for the Battle of the Bellas being absent from the show last week. He says that it was due to the untimely death of Old Guy McMahon. Old Guy McMahon comes out and says that he's alive and well and Triple H McMahon punches him in the throat causing him to collapse to the mat bleeding profusely from the mouth. Triple H McMahon says he's dead now. Noodle Hair is shown watching backstage eating the same Ramen noodles that he was last week.
Jennifer Hudson's Husband faces off against Hungry Man to open the show and Hungry Man eats him causing the match to end. Hungry Man screams that he is still hungry and Ginger comes out with Adam Drug Doer and they say that they too are hungry but for a different reason before winking at the camera.
April Brooks returns by saying that she was given a Z-Pak and told to go home. British Girl comes out and slaps her tits and April slaps her across the face. The two have a very sexual encounter as Old Guy McMahon is seen watching on the monitor. The fans anticipate him to say that it's not PG but the camera zooms in on his crotch showing a very large erection. He looks at the camera and gives a thumbs up.
SETH and Weird Transvestite Guy are at a restaurant eating dinner when The Artist Formerly Known As Dashing shows up and asks Weird Transvestite Guy about their relationship. Weird Transvestite Guy says "Fuck off nerd" and throws a plate at his head knocking him out.
Johnny Danceman is backstage with Can't Wrestle For Shit and tells her that she can't wrestle and should just quick. She calls him a douche and Likes Cats shows up and says that he can clean her pussy any day and Nattie's Husband shows up looking angry but Likes Cats pulls out her cat and hands it to Danceman saying to clean it.
The Battle of the Bellas takes place and Daniel Bella beats John Bella with the Crippler Crossface and the commentators once again talk about Chris Benoit and we cut to Old Guy McMahon screaming backstage before running boner first into a brick wall and falling to the ground with blood pooling in his crotch area.
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Post by Joey on Jan 26, 2015 9:59:22 GMT -5
WSE Monday Night 4 Pounds of Shit in a 3 Pound Bag 5 Time is the only member of the announce team present and in the other two seats are buckets of KFC chicken which 5 Time claims are still the sponsors of the show. We immediately cut to a video package of SETH and Weird Transvestite Guy in a supermarket. They climb into a cart and begin thrusting which drives the shopping cart around the store while confused customers watch/jerk off/throw up. Old Guy McMahon is shown jumping out of his limousine and being run over by an 18 wheeler.
The Rock's Cousin opens the action against Jobber. Shockingly Jobber goes over by pouring a glass of iced tea on Rock's Cousin's head thus knocking him out. 5 Time is shown at the announce desk with KFC chicken hanging out of his mouth looking shocked.
Noodle Hair comes out and cuts a promo wondering why his hair still looks like Ramen. Old Noodle Hair comes out which shocks everyone and he tells Noodle Hair that he is his father and Noodle Hair screams "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" as Old Noodle Hair chops his hand off with a lightsaber.
The Man of 1004 Returns returns again and fights Adam Drug Doer. Ginger lights up a joint on the outside and the match ends with everyone smoking in the ring including the fans. Old Guy McMahon is shown laying in the middle of the highway screaming as another 18 wheeler runs him over.
Nattie's Husband and Antonio These 4 Ropes team up with one another to face off against The Bella Brothers also known as John Bella and Daniel Bella who just had the Battle of the Bellas last week. Johnny Danceman interrupts the match and attacks John Bella and beats him until he is bleeding. The show ends with doctors being shown taking Old Guy McMahon's pulse and shaking their heads.
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Post by Joey on Jan 26, 2015 20:27:27 GMT -5
WSE Rock's Catchphrase Black Guy That Was on NXT, Vintage! and Jerry Pervert open the show by saying that Sweaty Men Going Fast and Hard is this Sunday live on the Thing That They Never Shut Up About for only $9.99. We cut to a video package featuring Noodle Hair and Old Noodle Hair. They are on a cliff and Road Agent is behind them. He shoves Old Noodle Hair off the cliff which is reminiscent of the Lion King. The video package ends with Noodle Hair telling Old Noodle Hair to wake up and crying as Road Agent watches on from the cliff.
Jimmy Snuka's Daughter fights Can't Wrestle For Shit in a match that nobody cares about because they all vacated the arena. The match ends with Jimmy Snuka hitting the Superfly Splash on his Daughter because he's old and senile.
For some reason, James Boner Licker is on the roof of the arena and police helicopters are swirling around. He screams at them that he is just trying to do the weather report. 5 Time arrives with a bucket of KFC chicken and gets shot at by the police but he manages to escape.
SETH and Weird Transvestite Guy are walking through the hallway when Horngobbler runs mouth first into SETH's gigantic erection, killing him instantly. SETH wonders what the hell just happened and Gay Black Guy returns to the WWE and gropes SETH's ass before running away giggling.
Libertarian Glenn cuts a promo about not having to pay taxes and Old Woman McMahon comes out and says that she ran for Congress. Libertarian Glenn chokeslams her through the ring and goes underneath with her. Sex is implied.
Johnny Danceman challenges anyone in the back to a dance off and Daniel Bella comes out and the two dance for 6 hours until Daniel Bella collapses from exhaustion. A bottle of steroids falls out of Johnny Danceman's pants and Old Guy McMahon is shown shitting himself top death to end the show.
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Post by Joey on Jan 26, 2015 20:35:37 GMT -5
Sweaty Men Going Fast and Hard Match Card
SETH on a Pole Match Weird Transvestite Guy vs. Gay Black Dude
Bathroom Break Belt Match Big Boobs Bella (c) vs. Likes Cats
Two Guys Belt Match The Samoan Brothers (c) vs. Adam Drug Doer & Ginger
Old Noodle Hair w/Noodle Hair vs. Road Agent
Main Event Belt Match/Battle of the Bellas 2 John Bella (c) vs. Daniel Bella
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Post by Joey on Jan 29, 2015 20:46:05 GMT -5
World Sports Entertainment is not in the least proud to introduce the first inductee into the WSE Hall of Non-Deserving Pieces of Shit... Shelton Benjamin's Mamma
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Post by Cole on Jan 29, 2015 20:47:12 GMT -5
World Sports Entertainment is not in the least proud to introduce the first inductee into the WSE Hall of Non-Deserving Pieces of Shit... Shelton Benjamin's Mamma Hahahahahahahahahaha literally crying.
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